18 Days.....

18 days....the box is still sitting here, I have not sealed it yet, let alone mail it...tomorrow...tomorrow ...tomorrow!

Ok, 18 more days...yesterday while visiting my bestest friend and her son (my nephew) who's 5 months old......thanks to her open ear and great input I left San Diego with a new perspective......

Since I received this awful news I have not touched anything....none of the projects I have been working on for Mester...her 1/2 painted rocking chair.....her book ends that I was making.....the toy box that I had just put a second coat of purple paint...it is all where I had left it....even her room that is "in progress"...I just stopped!!!! And its not like all this stuff is hidden in some nice corner...oh no...its all in the middle of my living room, so I am looking at it all the time.

I decided that darnit, I am going to keep going...I am going to finish these projects I had started...I am going to keep the optimism that this will work out!!!!! It dawned on me that not completing these things was sending the "universe"/"god" whoever, the wrong message! In my moving forward I am sending the univers the message that I believe she is my daughter, I believe she will be here and so I am continuing to get my life/my home/her room ready for her!!!!

Last night I did sooooo much around my house that assisted in getting her room even more ready and IT FELT GREAT!!!!

Today in an exchange of emails with my agency rep (Alisa) we have learned that yes this man who is claiming to be her father physically threatened her mother! Explains a lot!!! Alisa said she had thought about telling me to go with her to Ethiopia on 2/9 but once she learned of the physical threat, did not want to put me in any danger or make the situation worse for her mother. I informed her that I completely understood but should she get there and determine that it is not as bad as she thought or that yes I should come then I will leave that night...I will be at LAX in less than an hour....she said she will let me know as soon as possible! 18 more days!!!!

I believe that should I go to Ethiopia in February, I will be bringing my daughter home!!!!!

Please continue to pray....please!!!!!